Reasons behind a road

South Africa - 2008

At this point is worth to ask, Why another blog?

I must confess that I never wrote a diary, but today I am stepping into a road that I want to document and share.

Until a couple of years ago (or maybe four) my life was pretty traditional and relatively successfully. I have found my partner for life, and we had built our common life project for 14 years. First we prepare ourselves academically, then through our professional efforts (always as employees and living of our paychecks) we acquired the necessary material goods – our own house, a car – to keep building our road together and to keep developing our home and family, and be blessed with two beautiful childs. Basically, everything was perfect. We had love, wealth, successful careers  and two precious kids.

On September 23, 2013, my wife passed away. Both her illness and her passing meant a deconstruction process in my life, rendering obsolete many paradigms, such as security and success. Without getting into details, I can say that this process brought a halt to my professional career, affected my physical and psychological wealth fare, took me back to old and harmful addictions, and the big challenge of raising a 4-year old boy and a 2-year old girl without their mother.

I have dedicated the last two years to restore myself. First on a personal y psychological level, recognize the loss, grief and overcome a clinical depression. After that, on second place, begin the rebuilding of my professional career, regain my self-confidence, learn to feel productive again and try to understand and recognize what I want to spend my time doing and what not. Today I can say that I accomplished both of those goals, but only on a first stage. I barely put in place a foundation from where I can see the road ahead that I need to walk to bring a better life for my and my kids.

So, Why another blog? Because I am starting to walk that road, a road that is probably too ambitious and where success is a slim chance, but nonetheless a road worth to travel and to document.  Today, after two years of restoration, I can say that I know what my goals are and that I have a deadline to carry out them.

My 40 birthday is one year and seven months from today.

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